We have gotten so busy with everything that blogging every day doesn't work... and much of our days are typical, normal.
This weekend we did celebrate Squirrel's birthday. Because of the girls we were unable to travel as we intended before they were placed with us. In order to do travel we are supposed to get permission from the bioparents and at this time it is unlikely we will be ever able to get that. On Saturday we opted for one of her favorite meals for lunch. Yes, we took two toddlers out for sushi. While they didn't eat a ton of sushi they did demolish the edamame and enjoyed the teriyaki chicken. We were especially impressed that they sat nicely and really tried hard to eat with their chopsticks. At one point we did get them forks, but neither of them opted to use them.
After lunch we went to the hobby store next door where we looked at the model airplanes and helicopters. We are working really hard at making these two nerds.
That evening was a birthday dinner with the neighbors and we enjoyed our cookout. The duo really adore the neighbors and their extended family.
Sunday - just think opposite of Saturday.
It was Squirrel's official birthday. On Saturday we had given Squirrel her birthday present (a glider chair) so the girls and I got up and went to get some birthday donuts. That gave Squirrel until 10 with some peace and quiet. The rest of the day was one giant meltdown. On Squirrel's big day we had hot dogs for lunch and frozen pizza for dinner. The only great thing we did that day was that I was able to go to Goodwill and Meijer during their nap. Goodwill was 50% off everything and I did some great school shopping and Meijer had an extra discount on their clearance toys. I think we may have Sissy's birthday presents (October) all purchased and much of our Christmas shopping done.
We didn't plan on the frozen pizza, we were actually going to go to the neighbor's again, but when their toddler was having a bad day and had to cancel it opened the door for us to take away the visit as we had threatened for the poor behavior. We aren't talking about a little issue here and there. It was literally a stomp on your face type of behavior (luckily I didn't get too bad of a fat lip). Bug was having issues so I was lying on the floor holding her (both of them seem to be secure in this position) and Sissy came roaring through and I had no time to react. It was her longest time out as she was not to move until she was able to apologize and it took her over 1/2 an hour to get to that point.
Monday
Bug screamed as we pulled up to "school" this is the first time she ever did this. I had to carry her in. After a few minutes we settled in. It was supposed to be a visit day, but of course, biomom did not call in. After school we all went to the neighbors' for dinner and the girls ate like the champs we brag them up to be. We did, however, have to take Bug's highchair over. Originally she tried to sit in a big chair but she looked so defeated.
Tuesday
Normal day off to school. Bio called in for her visit today. Then the B---- didn't show up. Our poor duo. This is the first time she pulled this where she is a call in but no show. Fortunately the girls love our transport worker so they spent the time telling her all about life at our house, what the weekend was like, and just general chatter. I tried to talk to Sissy a little about the missed visit in the evening, but she was not too phased. Her resiliency is fantastic. Why would someone call in about a visit at 8:30 in the morning and then not show at 11:30.
Well, we will see what happens... court date on Wednesday morning.
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
Friday, July 24, 2015
Eight weeks
Life is pretty normal so not always a ton to write about.
On Wednesday Sissy started wearing underwear all day when we are awake. We are pretty excited to cut back on our diaper purchasing, but it is causing for a little extra laundry during the week.
Yesterday we had our 2 hour family visit. Since court was on Tuesday we had to make up the visit time even though bios skipped court. I really wish that the bios would take care of their lice issue so that the girls would not have to do all their visits outside in the park. Some of these days are super hot and there is no real shelter to play under so they are just baking our kids. They have started to bring snacks and drinks, but we are now having to deal with sugar hyped toddlers as they bring Kool-Aid and "Fruit" snacks. Our house is water and fruits and vegetables. *sigh*
After the family visit we decided to take the girls to a local event. It was a festival of sorts with craft areas, game areas, and gardens at a local historical home (giant facility). We did okay. The crowds weren't too scary. We actually sat and watched a magic show for a bit. This all pushed dinner back so by the time we ate (around 7) we were monsters.
Today marks 8 weeks. We did our typical Friday night Mexican, but added Squirrel's mom. The girls love having her around. After school and before dinner Sissy was having a "meltdown" for no apparent reason and declared to Squirrel that she needed to sit in the "calm down chair" and put herself in it and gathered her self. It is interesting how these simple things get absorbed. We don't put them in that chair very often, but when we do we are firm, but gentle. It is not a scolding, but a matter of fact we need you to gather yourself. There is no minimum and no maximum time and it works for both of them.
After dinner Bug was pretty tired and actually crashed early. Squirrel's mom was visiting and we got some nice time. Sissy was allowed to be a "big girl" and we got a game out (Stay Alive). Up to this point we have not understood games or taking turns. Tonight we caught on. It is amazing how we are picking up on a few things. Sissy also mastered her colors this week. Next week we will work on shapes. We are also going to keep working on chewing with your mouth closed for table manners. At school we have been learning some not so great habits so we are constantly working on extremely good habits at home. Sissy has also mastered how to ask politely for things without whining. This was for our sanity. Up to this point is was "I want ..." in a terrible whiny/demanding voice. We would redirect and say a complete sentence back and ask her to repeat (not always successful). "May I have some more milk please?" Just the other day she started to automatically use her polite sentences. This simple change is making incredible differences and especially at meals.
So, eight weeks in and the consistency is proving to work. There are many things that I was skeptical about that with a try prove to be fruitful. I would have never imagined that a calm down chair would really be used.
On Wednesday Sissy started wearing underwear all day when we are awake. We are pretty excited to cut back on our diaper purchasing, but it is causing for a little extra laundry during the week.
Yesterday we had our 2 hour family visit. Since court was on Tuesday we had to make up the visit time even though bios skipped court. I really wish that the bios would take care of their lice issue so that the girls would not have to do all their visits outside in the park. Some of these days are super hot and there is no real shelter to play under so they are just baking our kids. They have started to bring snacks and drinks, but we are now having to deal with sugar hyped toddlers as they bring Kool-Aid and "Fruit" snacks. Our house is water and fruits and vegetables. *sigh*
After the family visit we decided to take the girls to a local event. It was a festival of sorts with craft areas, game areas, and gardens at a local historical home (giant facility). We did okay. The crowds weren't too scary. We actually sat and watched a magic show for a bit. This all pushed dinner back so by the time we ate (around 7) we were monsters.
Today marks 8 weeks. We did our typical Friday night Mexican, but added Squirrel's mom. The girls love having her around. After school and before dinner Sissy was having a "meltdown" for no apparent reason and declared to Squirrel that she needed to sit in the "calm down chair" and put herself in it and gathered her self. It is interesting how these simple things get absorbed. We don't put them in that chair very often, but when we do we are firm, but gentle. It is not a scolding, but a matter of fact we need you to gather yourself. There is no minimum and no maximum time and it works for both of them.
 |
| When I began writing tonight I asked Sissy to go to bed. At the end I found her asleep here. Only feet from us at the bottom of the stairs. Poor girl refuses to admit she is tired and can fall asleep anywhere. |
So, eight weeks in and the consistency is proving to work. There are many things that I was skeptical about that with a try prove to be fruitful. I would have never imagined that a calm down chair would really be used.
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Court date #2
Today revolved around one major activity for Squirrel and I. We went to our first court date for our kids. It wasn't that we had anything to do. We just feel like we need to directly know what is going on.
So... we get to the courthouse and we don't know what we are doing. We go to walk into the courtroom and a woman in a side room asks if we are the girls' foster parents. It is our new case worker! Yes, the woman who hasn't called me back since Thursday. She has the "oops, busted face" going on and has to do some pedaling quickly to come up with some answers. We chatted with her for quite some time and then who walks in but our legal liaison. Busted! He has not called back since Thursday either. Here we are with both of them so we were able to nail them down for some direct answers.
We had quite a bit of time with them as we waited before going into the court room. Why did we have time? Well, because biomom was a no show. Seriously? Who doesn't show to court when your children are removed from your home? Second no show for her... yet we have to make up today's missed visit on Thursday? That is messed up.
While we are waiting we got to throw a lot of requests at our case worker.
1. Speech therapy for both
2. FAS testing for Sissy
3. Suspended visits until biomom gets her lice taken care of
4. Visits not at the awful park
5. Regulated guests at visits (we had a crazy amount of people at a visit)
6. Play therapy for Sissy
Some of these requests were eagerly received by our caseworker, some not so much. She really balked at the FAS testing and the therapies. Really? I think these are some things that the girls really need. We can handle a not so great park and we can deal with having to do lice prevention all the time. These items will not harm the girls forever. If we don't tackle the speech issues that will continue. All the kids except the oldest of the 5 have the speech issues. The FAS isn't limited to Sissy. The caseworker for the oldest two believes that the 15 year old may also have FAS and is pushing for testing for him. We need the diagnosis for services. If we were to test and it comes back negative, great! If not we need to be ready to get the services that are needed.
What we were able to get at court... nothing. Since biomom did not show up there were no requests made of the judge.
What did happen: Their 7 year old sister was placed immediately with her biodad. A huge surprise to us. Last we knew he was not ready. It was not anticipated by her fostermom either otherwise we would have gotten together this weekend.
We also had a great conversation with the case worker for the girls' oldest two siblings. We now have contact info for their foster family so we can go visit them.
Having the 7 year old now placed with her biodad shifts the dynamics of the whole thing. A friend who used to be a reunification worker was talking with us this past weekend and was saying how they try to keep the unit together and as long as they were all in care that there would be reunification attempts. She also said that if any of the kids are not placed with the biomom that there is a higher likelihood that reunification won't happen. Who knows.
Really though, who has 5 kids taken away and doesn't bother to show up in court?
For us. Even though we have no results from the court visit for the girls our comfort level with the courtroom is there. We now know a little of what to expect. It is the little things, like the acoustics of the room that can throw you off. Showing up also shows all the workers around the case that we are serious about these girls.
The next court date is next Wednesday. Anyone want to place bets on if she shows?
So... we get to the courthouse and we don't know what we are doing. We go to walk into the courtroom and a woman in a side room asks if we are the girls' foster parents. It is our new case worker! Yes, the woman who hasn't called me back since Thursday. She has the "oops, busted face" going on and has to do some pedaling quickly to come up with some answers. We chatted with her for quite some time and then who walks in but our legal liaison. Busted! He has not called back since Thursday either. Here we are with both of them so we were able to nail them down for some direct answers.
We had quite a bit of time with them as we waited before going into the court room. Why did we have time? Well, because biomom was a no show. Seriously? Who doesn't show to court when your children are removed from your home? Second no show for her... yet we have to make up today's missed visit on Thursday? That is messed up.
While we are waiting we got to throw a lot of requests at our case worker.
1. Speech therapy for both
2. FAS testing for Sissy
3. Suspended visits until biomom gets her lice taken care of
4. Visits not at the awful park
5. Regulated guests at visits (we had a crazy amount of people at a visit)
6. Play therapy for Sissy
Some of these requests were eagerly received by our caseworker, some not so much. She really balked at the FAS testing and the therapies. Really? I think these are some things that the girls really need. We can handle a not so great park and we can deal with having to do lice prevention all the time. These items will not harm the girls forever. If we don't tackle the speech issues that will continue. All the kids except the oldest of the 5 have the speech issues. The FAS isn't limited to Sissy. The caseworker for the oldest two believes that the 15 year old may also have FAS and is pushing for testing for him. We need the diagnosis for services. If we were to test and it comes back negative, great! If not we need to be ready to get the services that are needed.
What we were able to get at court... nothing. Since biomom did not show up there were no requests made of the judge.
What did happen: Their 7 year old sister was placed immediately with her biodad. A huge surprise to us. Last we knew he was not ready. It was not anticipated by her fostermom either otherwise we would have gotten together this weekend.
We also had a great conversation with the case worker for the girls' oldest two siblings. We now have contact info for their foster family so we can go visit them.
Having the 7 year old now placed with her biodad shifts the dynamics of the whole thing. A friend who used to be a reunification worker was talking with us this past weekend and was saying how they try to keep the unit together and as long as they were all in care that there would be reunification attempts. She also said that if any of the kids are not placed with the biomom that there is a higher likelihood that reunification won't happen. Who knows.
Really though, who has 5 kids taken away and doesn't bother to show up in court?
For us. Even though we have no results from the court visit for the girls our comfort level with the courtroom is there. We now know a little of what to expect. It is the little things, like the acoustics of the room that can throw you off. Showing up also shows all the workers around the case that we are serious about these girls.
The next court date is next Wednesday. Anyone want to place bets on if she shows?
Monday, July 20, 2015
Carving out the time
Rabbit here... I am on Squirrel's computer and don't remember my log in, so I'm just using her computer.
Normal day today. Only unique thing was that Squirrel got to experience the full turd in the tub tonight. Bug has been refusing to poop at school so not too surprised, but we will probably do "speed baths" when we have not pooped at school. I would much rather clean a diaper than a tub.
A friend asked a question on facebook today and it was more than I can answer in a quick facebook way: "Fellow parents of small children, how do you find the time to do things other than parent and work? We have a small child with us temporarily, for part of the week, and we do all the 'extras' on our days 'off.' But sometime soon we hope to have a full-time child or two."
We knew when we went into this that we would lose some time to do our other things, but honestly, I think I expected to lose more time than we are at this time. I would say the first 4 weeks feel like you have no time, but after that it starts to relax. We found our time by creating structure and boundaries. It feels like you are a big bully and super conservative, but it is worth it. Some folks may say we are too rigid, but it works for us and our girls respect it. I think our girls often prefer to be treated like little adults.
Our schedule is set. We hold to fairly regular meal, snack, walk, bath, and sleep times. By doing so we have created pockets of time for ourselves. The girls are in bed by 9:00 and we get up at 7:15 (I magically get them to school around 7:30. Clothes are laid out the night before. Hair is done the night before so that the morning only needs a refresh. When home the meals are at 9:00, 12:00, 4:00 (snack) and 6:00. There are no other meals. This has decreased the constant begging for food. While this was tough with the food insecurity, it is working. Naps are 2 hours and start between 1 and 2.
During the morning most of the play is on your own. Afternoon play may be directed. This allows us to do what we need to do while the girls do what they "need" to. The afternoon play often is to do some learning with colors, shapes, alphabets, etc.
It is okay to not play with your kids all the time. We are super lucky that the duo's school really helps them learn self-directed play and keeps them exploring. This carries over a lot at home.
With this we have learned to listen for key behaviors and we can be in separate rooms, or even floors and know what they are up to. Having a little trust in them helps a lot.
The first few weeks we didn't let them out of our sight... now the duo knows that I will not be downstairs until after my shower and they are to play calmly and wait for their cereal.
We give each other "adult time" each week. Away from home and away from the duo.
It is okay to sit on the front porch and visit with the neighbor when the kids are napping. Nobody wants to be inside all day. We are also lucky that our neighbors are like family. So much so that our duo has started referring to their grandma and grandpa as such.
In our house we also keep a focus on keeping the house clean and picked up. After a meal the dishes are done. Before going outside the toys are picked up. We have the duo put their toys faway. This is dual purpose. We don't get overwhelmed and we are teaching them how to be respectful of their environment. Bug actually gets very upset if I start to vacuum and she does not have her little vacuum to help. I have done my laundry on a routine for several years and I was able to maintain that when the girls came in the house. I do all laundry on Saturday or Sunday morning... every last bit of it. There is no searching for items that may be clean or may not.
Hobbies don't have to be hidden from the kids. It took me a few weeks, but now if I want to play the piano I do so. The girls may or may not choose to sit with me, but I am doing what I want and they are doing what they want. I may bust into a little Twinkle Twinkle just for them, but it is a small compromise.
Shopping is done with intention. Wandering the aisles slowly is not an option. We can do a full grocery trip in less than 30 minutes. All grocery shopping must be done after feeding the duo. Browsing is not an option.
We are working on a few things that will fit in with our hobbies. Hopefully we will get the duo pedaling their own bikes soon. That will open up the option for them to bike with us when we run or even a family bike "trip".
So I may have to give up a band or two. I still managed to throw my 90 year old friend a birthday party, complete with 90 homemade cupcakes. While I don't ride my cycle every day I have figured out that I can drop the girls at school, return home and get my bike and still be to work on time. A little bit here and there and it works out. Sometimes I feel like we are able to do more in a day than before, but Squirrel doesn't think so.
One thing to note is that we have been extremely lucky that our foster agency transports and supervises visits so that is not a time suck (3+ hours a week). I am also lucky that my colleagues are awesome.
Normal day today. Only unique thing was that Squirrel got to experience the full turd in the tub tonight. Bug has been refusing to poop at school so not too surprised, but we will probably do "speed baths" when we have not pooped at school. I would much rather clean a diaper than a tub.
A friend asked a question on facebook today and it was more than I can answer in a quick facebook way: "Fellow parents of small children, how do you find the time to do things other than parent and work? We have a small child with us temporarily, for part of the week, and we do all the 'extras' on our days 'off.' But sometime soon we hope to have a full-time child or two."
We knew when we went into this that we would lose some time to do our other things, but honestly, I think I expected to lose more time than we are at this time. I would say the first 4 weeks feel like you have no time, but after that it starts to relax. We found our time by creating structure and boundaries. It feels like you are a big bully and super conservative, but it is worth it. Some folks may say we are too rigid, but it works for us and our girls respect it. I think our girls often prefer to be treated like little adults.
Our schedule is set. We hold to fairly regular meal, snack, walk, bath, and sleep times. By doing so we have created pockets of time for ourselves. The girls are in bed by 9:00 and we get up at 7:15 (I magically get them to school around 7:30. Clothes are laid out the night before. Hair is done the night before so that the morning only needs a refresh. When home the meals are at 9:00, 12:00, 4:00 (snack) and 6:00. There are no other meals. This has decreased the constant begging for food. While this was tough with the food insecurity, it is working. Naps are 2 hours and start between 1 and 2.
During the morning most of the play is on your own. Afternoon play may be directed. This allows us to do what we need to do while the girls do what they "need" to. The afternoon play often is to do some learning with colors, shapes, alphabets, etc.
It is okay to not play with your kids all the time. We are super lucky that the duo's school really helps them learn self-directed play and keeps them exploring. This carries over a lot at home.
With this we have learned to listen for key behaviors and we can be in separate rooms, or even floors and know what they are up to. Having a little trust in them helps a lot.
The first few weeks we didn't let them out of our sight... now the duo knows that I will not be downstairs until after my shower and they are to play calmly and wait for their cereal.
We give each other "adult time" each week. Away from home and away from the duo.
It is okay to sit on the front porch and visit with the neighbor when the kids are napping. Nobody wants to be inside all day. We are also lucky that our neighbors are like family. So much so that our duo has started referring to their grandma and grandpa as such.
In our house we also keep a focus on keeping the house clean and picked up. After a meal the dishes are done. Before going outside the toys are picked up. We have the duo put their toys faway. This is dual purpose. We don't get overwhelmed and we are teaching them how to be respectful of their environment. Bug actually gets very upset if I start to vacuum and she does not have her little vacuum to help. I have done my laundry on a routine for several years and I was able to maintain that when the girls came in the house. I do all laundry on Saturday or Sunday morning... every last bit of it. There is no searching for items that may be clean or may not.
Hobbies don't have to be hidden from the kids. It took me a few weeks, but now if I want to play the piano I do so. The girls may or may not choose to sit with me, but I am doing what I want and they are doing what they want. I may bust into a little Twinkle Twinkle just for them, but it is a small compromise.
Shopping is done with intention. Wandering the aisles slowly is not an option. We can do a full grocery trip in less than 30 minutes. All grocery shopping must be done after feeding the duo. Browsing is not an option.
We are working on a few things that will fit in with our hobbies. Hopefully we will get the duo pedaling their own bikes soon. That will open up the option for them to bike with us when we run or even a family bike "trip".
So I may have to give up a band or two. I still managed to throw my 90 year old friend a birthday party, complete with 90 homemade cupcakes. While I don't ride my cycle every day I have figured out that I can drop the girls at school, return home and get my bike and still be to work on time. A little bit here and there and it works out. Sometimes I feel like we are able to do more in a day than before, but Squirrel doesn't think so.
One thing to note is that we have been extremely lucky that our foster agency transports and supervises visits so that is not a time suck (3+ hours a week). I am also lucky that my colleagues are awesome.
Sunday, July 19, 2015
Sing yourself to sleep
Squirrel has some time off this coming week so she had to work today to make up for it. That left me with weekend errands with the duo.
First stop was to a garage sale a friend told us about. Her friends were having it and they supposedly had some size 5 clothes. Jackpot! It wasn't a huge sale, but less than $10 and we have enough pants and clothes for this fall. The hardest thing to find the girls are pants without spending crazy amounts. We have yet to get our clothing allowance and even if we had pants are still more than we wish to spend most of the time. Mind you, I'm not able to comb adds or window shop with these two. It is more like a dash and grab. When you are dashing and grabbing it is hard to find those sale prices. Until today we also have not mastered the "try this on" concept. Everything we put on we don't want to take off! Until today. We had so many clothes that Sissy was excited to put the next thing on and super cooperative. Of the 8 pair of pants or so we only had 1 pair that I thought were to small. It was great at the sale as the hosts' daughters played well with the girls while I was able to shop.
After the garage sale we headed to the outlet mall, and more specifically Old Navy as they had a sale this week, even on their clearance. That didn't go as well as the garage sale. We got a few great prices on some shirts and then we were too crazy to keep shopping. I actually had to do a football carry on Bug to get her out of the store and to the car. Trying to carry her normal she pushes off with both her arms and feet and I can only dedicate one arm to carrying her as the other is holding Sissy's hand.
I thought our errands would be done at that point, but when we got close to home they were calm so I braved JoAnn's with them. I have wanted to put different curtains up versus the black and white ones I have had in the girls' room. Both of the girls were great in the store. It helped that they both were able to ride in the cart. We all picked out the fabric together. Some pretty pastel stripes with sparkles on it.
Home meant lunch and then they were quite tired so "rest" time. Naps did not happen quickly. It took them two cranky hours before they crashed. They were then out for two hours. That gave me four hours to do all the laundry, make the curtains, and clean up around the house.
Sissy allowed me to put her hair in pigtails today. I like the look much more than the whale spout that she has been sporting. She even allowed me to trim the uneven hair at her neck. Her poor little neck is all scarred from her itching when we got her and with the pigtails it is easily seen.
After dinner Bug also allowed me to try pigtails in her hair. They are both so darn cute! We all then had to go next door to show the neighbors. They love the neighbors. Just our luck, they were just getting ready to cook out. The girls settled right in and each had 2 hotdogs and sides (each). This is after we had already eaten our dinner. Oh well.
Now we are all tucked in. The girls have finally fallen asleep. Amazing how just a few short weeks ago they screamed and cried their way to sleep. Tonight they sang themselves to sleep.
First stop was to a garage sale a friend told us about. Her friends were having it and they supposedly had some size 5 clothes. Jackpot! It wasn't a huge sale, but less than $10 and we have enough pants and clothes for this fall. The hardest thing to find the girls are pants without spending crazy amounts. We have yet to get our clothing allowance and even if we had pants are still more than we wish to spend most of the time. Mind you, I'm not able to comb adds or window shop with these two. It is more like a dash and grab. When you are dashing and grabbing it is hard to find those sale prices. Until today we also have not mastered the "try this on" concept. Everything we put on we don't want to take off! Until today. We had so many clothes that Sissy was excited to put the next thing on and super cooperative. Of the 8 pair of pants or so we only had 1 pair that I thought were to small. It was great at the sale as the hosts' daughters played well with the girls while I was able to shop.
After the garage sale we headed to the outlet mall, and more specifically Old Navy as they had a sale this week, even on their clearance. That didn't go as well as the garage sale. We got a few great prices on some shirts and then we were too crazy to keep shopping. I actually had to do a football carry on Bug to get her out of the store and to the car. Trying to carry her normal she pushes off with both her arms and feet and I can only dedicate one arm to carrying her as the other is holding Sissy's hand.
I thought our errands would be done at that point, but when we got close to home they were calm so I braved JoAnn's with them. I have wanted to put different curtains up versus the black and white ones I have had in the girls' room. Both of the girls were great in the store. It helped that they both were able to ride in the cart. We all picked out the fabric together. Some pretty pastel stripes with sparkles on it.
Home meant lunch and then they were quite tired so "rest" time. Naps did not happen quickly. It took them two cranky hours before they crashed. They were then out for two hours. That gave me four hours to do all the laundry, make the curtains, and clean up around the house.
Sissy allowed me to put her hair in pigtails today. I like the look much more than the whale spout that she has been sporting. She even allowed me to trim the uneven hair at her neck. Her poor little neck is all scarred from her itching when we got her and with the pigtails it is easily seen.
After dinner Bug also allowed me to try pigtails in her hair. They are both so darn cute! We all then had to go next door to show the neighbors. They love the neighbors. Just our luck, they were just getting ready to cook out. The girls settled right in and each had 2 hotdogs and sides (each). This is after we had already eaten our dinner. Oh well.
Now we are all tucked in. The girls have finally fallen asleep. Amazing how just a few short weeks ago they screamed and cried their way to sleep. Tonight they sang themselves to sleep.
Saturday, July 18, 2015
Run!
I'm sure bioparents know this, but I hadn't. When you have toddlers you have about 3 hours in which to do all your social life for the day. Unfortunately for us those hours are 9-12 when none of our normal peeps are ready on the weekend. After 12 it is lunch, naps, dinner, bath, bed with a little play time between each. Sometimes we are able to skip the naps, but that ends up with other complications later.
Sissy is trying to be more helpful and today she tried to balance her glass on her plate to bring it to the kitchen. It was a thinner glass than usual (dishwasher was running) and unfortunately it fell and broke. Poor girl thought I was going to yell when I ran to swoop her up. She had no injuries, but I did end up with a small glass sliver and one of the dogs did cut her paw. We all worked together and put a bandage on the dog's boo-boo.
Our 9-12 today was filled with an adventure to a local road race. We have both done the race since it started a few years ago and this year Squirrel had to miss it to take care of the girls so I could trudge the 9.3 miles. This is actually a race she struggles with every year so it was unlikely with the missed training this year that it would have been a very successful run anyways.
So... off I go to my race. Squirrel was bringing the girls to the tots trot later in the morning so I rode my bike to the race so we only had one vehicle in the end. It was HOT! Usually I am cold for the first mile or three, but I was sweating before it even started. I survived, but unfortunately I was 6 minutes late to see the kids' race/run. We knew Bug likes to run, but weren't very sure about Sissy. They both loved it! Fortunately a friend stepped in and helped Squirrel because as soon as they said "start" the duo split and ran in different directions. They were so cute with their little running numbers on.
After our runs we all had Popsicles, cookies, and bananas (I'm starting to really love anyone that feeds my kids) and then let the girls jump in the bounce houses. It was really a shame that there were 2 bounce houses and barely any kids in them. At most there were 5 in one at one time. That was perfect for us. We were able to let the kids bounce as much as they wanted as we were able to just sit in the shade and watch. Each jump exhausting their little bodies more and more. It is amazing to think that 3-4 weeks ago they could have never handled the crowds and now we were able to just sit back and watch.
A lot of things have gotten so much better. Sissy is really not testing boundaries anymore (Bug is now). We still have food issues, but we aren't screaming about them so much. All of us have really started to settle in.
After our morning adventures at the race we were interested in going to ride the bus for a town tour of attractions, and it was only a dollar a person, but we opted to stay home as it looked a bit stormy and then we needed our naps. The naps were awesome and Squirrel and I quickly cleaned a bit of the house. After the 2 hour nap the girls played in their room quietly for an entire hour before coming down.
Sissy is trying to be more helpful and today she tried to balance her glass on her plate to bring it to the kitchen. It was a thinner glass than usual (dishwasher was running) and unfortunately it fell and broke. Poor girl thought I was going to yell when I ran to swoop her up. She had no injuries, but I did end up with a small glass sliver and one of the dogs did cut her paw. We all worked together and put a bandage on the dog's boo-boo.
I took a risk after dinner and got out supplies to make bracelets. I know that beads are advanced for a 2 and 3 year old, but we need to find ways to keep them out of our stuff and they have a huge attraction for our jewelry. They both did great! Bug sat in her high chair and I mainly made her bracelet and Sissy was able to do half of hers by herself. The bracelets probably won't last too long as they yank on them and the clasps are magnetic so they are sticking them everywhere, but now we have an alternative to our items.
We did play outside after dinner as well, but we scurried in when the neighbors got their pizza. We have learned to remove them when it is time for someone else to eat. One day the neighbor came outside eating chips and dip and he was pretty much tackled by our duo.
That's our day... pretty normal day for anyone's standards and that is a nice place to be at.
Friday, July 17, 2015
Seven weeks
Where I work it is expected that you call people back in a reasonable time. I believe within 24 hours, or 1 work day is reasonable.
Apparently in foster care that is not what happens. Neither of our calls yesterday to our case worker or our legal liaison were returned. If you have 105 foster families with your agency and you have two case workers (which would be less than I guess they have) each case worker would have 52 families. If each of these families called once a week you would have 10 calls a day to make. Reality is we call once every 3 weeks or so and if that is average then a case worker has 3 calls to make a day. Point is... return my call! I'm just not comfortable that the visits seem a bit contrary to what our court papers say.
We finished another great week of school. Every day the girls respond better and better to being dropped off and picked up. Bug's reports every day are that she is a happy kid, but today one of her teachers asked about the dynamics between the girls. Now that she is comfortable a bit of her spunk is starting to show. When she wants or doesn't want something she lets it known. Apparently she has even started to swing when she doesn't want something. We don't tolerate that at home and it is nice that school is also not allowing such actions. She tends to really want to fight getting in or out of the car (depending if she wants to go or stay) or when you try to remove her from her high chair. She also gets feisty when she can't figure something out, like when she knows where the letter "I" goes in her puzzle but it doesn't fit (has to be flipped upside down as it is not symetrical).
The evening today went quickly again. Squirrel managed to create a meltdown or two... like when the baseball bat was taken away when Sissy whacked Bug in the head, but that is to be expected. After I got home we ran to the running store to register for tomorrow's races and the girls were terrible in there so we drug them out (I had to put Bug under my arm and hold tight), but we then decided to go for tacos (becoming a Friday tradition). Neither girl wanted to stop eating! After tacos it was baths and bed.
Weekdays are so much easier now that we have help with daycare.
Apparently in foster care that is not what happens. Neither of our calls yesterday to our case worker or our legal liaison were returned. If you have 105 foster families with your agency and you have two case workers (which would be less than I guess they have) each case worker would have 52 families. If each of these families called once a week you would have 10 calls a day to make. Reality is we call once every 3 weeks or so and if that is average then a case worker has 3 calls to make a day. Point is... return my call! I'm just not comfortable that the visits seem a bit contrary to what our court papers say.
We finished another great week of school. Every day the girls respond better and better to being dropped off and picked up. Bug's reports every day are that she is a happy kid, but today one of her teachers asked about the dynamics between the girls. Now that she is comfortable a bit of her spunk is starting to show. When she wants or doesn't want something she lets it known. Apparently she has even started to swing when she doesn't want something. We don't tolerate that at home and it is nice that school is also not allowing such actions. She tends to really want to fight getting in or out of the car (depending if she wants to go or stay) or when you try to remove her from her high chair. She also gets feisty when she can't figure something out, like when she knows where the letter "I" goes in her puzzle but it doesn't fit (has to be flipped upside down as it is not symetrical).
The evening today went quickly again. Squirrel managed to create a meltdown or two... like when the baseball bat was taken away when Sissy whacked Bug in the head, but that is to be expected. After I got home we ran to the running store to register for tomorrow's races and the girls were terrible in there so we drug them out (I had to put Bug under my arm and hold tight), but we then decided to go for tacos (becoming a Friday tradition). Neither girl wanted to stop eating! After tacos it was baths and bed.
Weekdays are so much easier now that we have help with daycare.
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