Today I ripped a bag of Doritos from my 2 year old's hands. I'm sorry, but a full giant bag of Doritos is not an appropriate bag of snacks to send your kid home from your visit.
The aftermath of family visits is just ugly. They are to keep the bond between the bioparents and the kids, but what it results is a foster parent's nightmare. After an hour of wild uncontrolled play we get to pull them back to reality and bring behavior back into a realistic realm. I'm not the one that has to be there during visits... luckily we have a transport worker that picks them up at school and then Squirrel gets there for the last 15 minutes or so and just has to wait for them. The visit was so rowdy today that the building security guard had a broken glass alarm.
Squirrel gets them home and then lets them run outside as long as possible. Once we get in the house we have to move on to dinner as quickly as possible to throw that anchor down. Telling them what is for dinner when we drop them off to school helps them plan for their night and their beds.
Back to the Doritos... they were so prized by Bug because her "daddy" gave them to her. He could give her so many better things for her wee little body. For the same cost as that bag of chips he could have bought a bag of apples. All his girls love apples. They also eat carrots like crazy. Cucumbers would be an option. Something with any nutritional value would be appreciated. This is super important to us with Bug right now. I'm afraid there may be something amiss with her growth. This week her WIC appointment put her at 4% for her height. With all the chips Bug ate she ate absolutely no protein for dinner.
All night has been screaming for mommy and daddy which I then put her in the "calm down chair" followed by her wanting to be close. Sissy is saying over and over again how much she wants to live here. I'm just waiting for 8:30 so that they go to bed. This behavior isn't their fault and I just need them to sleep.
Monday, September 28, 2015
Thursday, September 24, 2015
Making plans, creating anchors
Well, we now have a streak of two weeks of family visits. I don't know if I should be enthusiastic and feel like this is a family that is getting their lives together or if I should be the skeptic that says this is just because court is looming in a week and half.
Today we tried a new tactic. After every visit we deal with behavior issues. Some because the kids are confused and others are because our rules do not apply in a family visit so they get away with pure chaos. We can't take away the chaos of the visit, but we can start offering the anchor to help them with their confusion. Sissy is a planner. She thrives on knowing what will happen in the next hour, next day and even next week. As an example: Tuesday night we told her she had an "appointment" the next morning to find out how she is growing. The following morning she was up, getting dressed and ready for her appointment. On Friday nights we tell her there is no school the next day and she wakes up the next morning and knows that she does not need to ready herself for school. Every Friday when they are dropped off at school they know that in the evening we will have tacos. They expect to be picked up in the truck and don't like it when I come in the car. They thrive on plans.
Today when I took them to school we talked about dinner. We have both enchiladas and spaghetti leftovers to eat. I asked what they wanted and they both wanted spaghetti. We made the plan. I told their transport worker when she informed me that the visit would happen that we would have spaghetti for dinner.
After the visit... they were ready for their spaghetti. They understood where they were going, they knew the next thing in their day. Bug was a little clingy after the visit, but there were no behavior issues. Giving the kids the plan for the evening helped them focus and know where their home is tonight. This is going to force me to meal plans, but the anchor for the kids will be worth it.
In other happenings: while the girls were playing with their kitchen tonight they decided that they would call Squirrel "mommy". They have learned that "mommy" is more than a name, but it is also a role that one plays in the household. There has been a lot of role play at school and it is happening more at home. Bug is really into imitating.
We had a WIC (food assistance) appointment the other day (as I said earlier). Squirrel had to take the girls so that their progress can be monitored. They also had a blood test to check their iron. The WIC appointment was actually more helpful than the Dr. appointment they had 3 months ago. Bug needed 2 more shots (poor kid). Both girls have a good iron count now. Apparently they were low at their last appointment (6 months ago). The folks at WIC are not concerned, but it seems like our Bug is a bit small. We knew that, but now we have more perspective. She is in 18 month pants still! When compared she is in the 4% in height and 23% weight. The 4% concerns me. It is small on its own, but her family is not made up of tiny short people. The weight does not surprise me as I feed her very well and she is not a picky eater. I am responsible for giving her a little round belly. On the flip side, Sissy is at 80% height and 88% weight. Most of Sissy's 5T pants are fitting her well. The folks at WIC took a lot more time to talk with Squirrel about the girls' health than the Dr. did. We have to go back every 3 months to renew the food benefits, but the girls go back in 6 months.
Today we tried a new tactic. After every visit we deal with behavior issues. Some because the kids are confused and others are because our rules do not apply in a family visit so they get away with pure chaos. We can't take away the chaos of the visit, but we can start offering the anchor to help them with their confusion. Sissy is a planner. She thrives on knowing what will happen in the next hour, next day and even next week. As an example: Tuesday night we told her she had an "appointment" the next morning to find out how she is growing. The following morning she was up, getting dressed and ready for her appointment. On Friday nights we tell her there is no school the next day and she wakes up the next morning and knows that she does not need to ready herself for school. Every Friday when they are dropped off at school they know that in the evening we will have tacos. They expect to be picked up in the truck and don't like it when I come in the car. They thrive on plans.
Today when I took them to school we talked about dinner. We have both enchiladas and spaghetti leftovers to eat. I asked what they wanted and they both wanted spaghetti. We made the plan. I told their transport worker when she informed me that the visit would happen that we would have spaghetti for dinner.
After the visit... they were ready for their spaghetti. They understood where they were going, they knew the next thing in their day. Bug was a little clingy after the visit, but there were no behavior issues. Giving the kids the plan for the evening helped them focus and know where their home is tonight. This is going to force me to meal plans, but the anchor for the kids will be worth it.
In other happenings: while the girls were playing with their kitchen tonight they decided that they would call Squirrel "mommy". They have learned that "mommy" is more than a name, but it is also a role that one plays in the household. There has been a lot of role play at school and it is happening more at home. Bug is really into imitating.
We had a WIC (food assistance) appointment the other day (as I said earlier). Squirrel had to take the girls so that their progress can be monitored. They also had a blood test to check their iron. The WIC appointment was actually more helpful than the Dr. appointment they had 3 months ago. Bug needed 2 more shots (poor kid). Both girls have a good iron count now. Apparently they were low at their last appointment (6 months ago). The folks at WIC are not concerned, but it seems like our Bug is a bit small. We knew that, but now we have more perspective. She is in 18 month pants still! When compared she is in the 4% in height and 23% weight. The 4% concerns me. It is small on its own, but her family is not made up of tiny short people. The weight does not surprise me as I feed her very well and she is not a picky eater. I am responsible for giving her a little round belly. On the flip side, Sissy is at 80% height and 88% weight. Most of Sissy's 5T pants are fitting her well. The folks at WIC took a lot more time to talk with Squirrel about the girls' health than the Dr. did. We have to go back every 3 months to renew the food benefits, but the girls go back in 6 months.
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Tiny Hulk
My poor angry Bug. We are now at a record streak for parent and family visits and that has thrown our behavior in a tailspin. The behavior isn't just at home, but she is also acting out at school. She is defiant one minute and then clinging to you like a spider monkey the next (not that I have any clue what a spider monkey really does).
The only explanations we have for this behavior is: 1. she is two, and 2. the parent visits. With Sissy we are having a few minor issues, but we are able to sit down and talk. Bug is not at that point yet. She tries, but can't have a serious conversation. When topics are lighter she can just sit and have a chat, but when you ask how she is feeling she pushes away and storms off.
This isn't just a little anger, but this is her tiny Hulk inside her. The growl comes from deep and it is unlike her other fussing. We hadn't seen it in weeks, weeks since she would ball her little fists and be so angry.
Her lashing out is starting to be directed at us. Particularly at times we have to care for her. Dressing and diapers are terrible times. Our usual happy to wear anything kid is becoming particular. If you aren't careful you may be hit when putting on pajamas. Changing a diaper is met with brutal kicks.
At school the behavior is coming out as not listening... I fear that the anger will be released there soon. I am afraid that the daily reports that come back are no longer going to have the happy box checked.
We worked so hard over the past 4 months to help these girls find joy and laughter. Now we are back to fighting off angry outbursts.
Typically we try to ignore the bad behavior as most is attention seeking. It has helped guide them to good, normal behavior. We also are extremely focused on good behavior and giving attention at those times. Back rubs are given when sitting still, hugs randomly when playing nice... all reinforcements. When Bug has her angry fits I am unable to ignore like the purposely bad behavior. It is like she can't control the tiny Hulk. I take her little body and quietly hold it tight as she struggles and is so tense and she finally melts and is back to herself. You can just feel the tension in her.
I can't wait for the next court date to arrive. Maybe then the visits will start to be missed again and we can have our happy little toddler back.
The only explanations we have for this behavior is: 1. she is two, and 2. the parent visits. With Sissy we are having a few minor issues, but we are able to sit down and talk. Bug is not at that point yet. She tries, but can't have a serious conversation. When topics are lighter she can just sit and have a chat, but when you ask how she is feeling she pushes away and storms off.
This isn't just a little anger, but this is her tiny Hulk inside her. The growl comes from deep and it is unlike her other fussing. We hadn't seen it in weeks, weeks since she would ball her little fists and be so angry.
Her lashing out is starting to be directed at us. Particularly at times we have to care for her. Dressing and diapers are terrible times. Our usual happy to wear anything kid is becoming particular. If you aren't careful you may be hit when putting on pajamas. Changing a diaper is met with brutal kicks.
At school the behavior is coming out as not listening... I fear that the anger will be released there soon. I am afraid that the daily reports that come back are no longer going to have the happy box checked.
We worked so hard over the past 4 months to help these girls find joy and laughter. Now we are back to fighting off angry outbursts.
Typically we try to ignore the bad behavior as most is attention seeking. It has helped guide them to good, normal behavior. We also are extremely focused on good behavior and giving attention at those times. Back rubs are given when sitting still, hugs randomly when playing nice... all reinforcements. When Bug has her angry fits I am unable to ignore like the purposely bad behavior. It is like she can't control the tiny Hulk. I take her little body and quietly hold it tight as she struggles and is so tense and she finally melts and is back to herself. You can just feel the tension in her.
I can't wait for the next court date to arrive. Maybe then the visits will start to be missed again and we can have our happy little toddler back.
Sunday, September 20, 2015
What to say...
You know how you have those times when you don't know what to say? Like when a card comes around the office and you just sign your name as you don't know what expression to put with it.
Our most often greeting from friends upon meeting our girls and one that we are most uncomfortable with is "Congratulations"
We don't keep track of who says it, and it takes us back a moment, but we quickly get over it. Congratulations isn't the right word though.
You see, our girls came through horrendous situations. It would be wonderful if this job of ours wasn't needed. This is and isn't what we want. This is and isn't an instant family. This is above and beyond all a job, a responsibility, something that we were driven to because we felt it was right, but unsure why.
Now we have two beautiful little girls that we have to take care of today and prepare them for their unknown tomorrow.
Really, if the bioparents really did what they are/were supposed to we either wouldn't have them in the first place or we would be giving them back in early October.
This is one of those situations... one which I would just sign my name on the card and pass it on as I don't know what to say, but from this side, Congratulations just doesn't feel right.
Maybe the most heartfelt reaction ever to meeting the girls has been from folks that have experienced foster care first hand. Took the girls to see a friend this weekend and they loved him... He just told us "thank you for what you are doing, this means a lot to me"
Our most often greeting from friends upon meeting our girls and one that we are most uncomfortable with is "Congratulations"
We don't keep track of who says it, and it takes us back a moment, but we quickly get over it. Congratulations isn't the right word though.
You see, our girls came through horrendous situations. It would be wonderful if this job of ours wasn't needed. This is and isn't what we want. This is and isn't an instant family. This is above and beyond all a job, a responsibility, something that we were driven to because we felt it was right, but unsure why.
Now we have two beautiful little girls that we have to take care of today and prepare them for their unknown tomorrow.
Really, if the bioparents really did what they are/were supposed to we either wouldn't have them in the first place or we would be giving them back in early October.
This is one of those situations... one which I would just sign my name on the card and pass it on as I don't know what to say, but from this side, Congratulations just doesn't feel right.
Maybe the most heartfelt reaction ever to meeting the girls has been from folks that have experienced foster care first hand. Took the girls to see a friend this weekend and they loved him... He just told us "thank you for what you are doing, this means a lot to me"
16 weeks and nearly 4 months
Sorry, I've been slacking on the writing lately. It isn't that I don't have things I want to write about. I just don't want to take the time at the end of the day.
I suppose it would be easier if I just wrote something short every day, but oh well... I haven't.
October 7th is the next court date for the girls' bioparents. As such, our world is now being tossed upside down. After missing 7 weeks of visits we now have had every single visit this week. Three parent visits and one sibling visit. The sibling visit is great. The parent visits are what throw the girls into behavior tailspins. Even Bug's teacher has remarked on how her behavior has been abnormal this week.
Week before last our caseworker finally had a call back from the biomom. A family team meeting was set up, biomom produced her letter stating that she is lice-free and is pretending she is actually doing something so that the next court date doesn't result in a change of goals from reunification to termination. The following day she skipped her visit. We weren't so lucky this week. Up until this week we didn't have a single week where she made all her visits.
When she did finally have her visit she told Sissy that she had been "in the hospital" and Sissy came home feeling sorry for her. I'm not letting those things slide. While I won't tell Sissy the whole story I did tell her the truth. I know that she was not in the hospital. I'm tech-savvy and know the web address to the biomom's facebook page. She is fine... actually posting some pictures of herself in a "Rehab 86" shirt. Not the best image for someone that should be getting her poop in a group. Up until this point we have not told the girls in advance when a visit is happening, but since Sissy thrives on logic and information we laid it all out for her.
"We have been working really hard to try to set up visits with mommy. Her visits are to be Monday, Tuesdays and Thursdays, but before the visit mommy is to call and say she will be there. She hasn't been calling" Then on Friday, Sissy asked if they would be seeing mommy and I said no, it is Friday, and it is our taco night... to which she responded "okay" and was unfazed.
This week it seems like Sissy is very unsure of her living situation. Nearly every day we get a hug and she tells us that she likes living here. It is so hard for a three year old to express that she is afraid of going back.
The sibling visit today was good for the girls. I don't like that the 7 year old's family pushes us to find out if we would adopt the girls. We are only 4 months into this journey and reunification is still the goal. Her father asked me today if we would continue sibling visits and I just had to tell him that I don't know, we aren't even near a point of termination of rights. While I think the relationships are important for the girls, I also think that they can pull them backwards too. One of the great things with the visit was that the two teens spent some quality time with us. We weren't super chummy, but we weren't ignored and avoided. They sat at the same picnic tables, we were able to ask about school, we shared the responsibilities of the little ones... they helped put our girls in the car. I wish that it would be safe for us to have them come visit at our house, but with them maintaining electronic contact with their biomom I just can't have them know where our house is. We don't need any surprise visits. That is also why we don't teach our kids our address... we don't need a toddler spouting out the address to the bios at a family visit. They say the darnest things and that would be something they are proud of and would tell everyone. Instead they are good at landmarks. When we drive and walk we ask them what they see and recognize. They can tell where our favorite restaurant is, where I work, where they go to school, and how to get home from the local convenience store.
Let's see what tomorrow brings... I'm not going to place any bets on whether or not the bios will call for their visit.
Sunday, September 6, 2015
14 weeks...
Only one day left. This week the girls had no day care so I had to burn a week of vacation to take care of them. We really need to get a few more folks certified as care givers, but the challenge is, who wants to take two rowdy little todders for an 8 hour shift? Our neighbors have taken them for our race a few weeks ago, but that was when both of them were home. With that in mind we would need 10 more caregivers in order to cover a week without taking time off of work. Looks like I will be taking time off as these odd days come up. Looks like we have some time before our next "break"though.
Monday was a good day and Squirrel worked a half day so we could go visit a friend. It was fantastic. The girls got to ride on the pontoon, swim in shallow water, and then we went on jet skis! These two are fearless. We also watched snakes that were on the rocks at the edge of the water. Nice thing for us was that with 4 other adults around we were able to just sit back and watch. We are always so engaged with the girls that it is exhausting. More and more we work on getting them to play without the need for us to be always present, but it is short lived.
Tuesday through Thursday were a blur. A toddler filled blur. We tried to go to the Children's Museum, but it is closed for most of the month (they could have notified their members), and didn't have a good alternative so we did lunch (tacos) with one of my co-workers. Sissy was not on good behavior, not that she was completely awful, but it was not nearly as good as she usually is. We played outside, we played with playdough, we chased bugs, we took naps, I longed for day care.
We had a case worker visit this week. It was fine as usual. Mostly just a restart of visits (potentially) and a start of regular sibling visits. Apparently the biomom has emerged from her month of not returning calls and is ready to maybe start things back up. I'm not holding my breath. Sibling visits are now twice a month.
The next court date is set... Part of me wants there to be no progress to reunification so that termination can begin and the other part of me wants some progress to happen. It is a hard position as we love these two, but on a week as exhausting as this one, we want some of our freedom back.
We made a conscious effort to get some of our freedom back this weekend. I pulled out a 1000 piece puzzle and declared it mine. I feel like a kid licking a cupcake so a sibling won't eat it. For the most part the girls respected it. We did try to take a few toys upstairs to their room, but now we have castles in the hallway as they didn't behave in their room.
Today we had our first sibling visit with the 7 year old and her biodad's family. The other two siblings were to be there as well, however nobody informed their foster parents of the visit. The 7's family seems alright. We got more backstory, got to see more pictures. The aunt says that she has never seen our girls in anything but a diaper before. Such a sad existence these girls have had. We also found out that our girls most likely had their lice for over a year!
After our family visit we had some hotdogs and then went swimming! The girls did great. Bug didn't want to be in the water as much as be around it, but Sissy was in it and loved it. She didn't panic at all this time. Usually we have a few times which we have to put her out of the water because in a panic she injures one of us, but today she was great. After our swim it was nap time (reluctantly at first) of which Sissy slept for an hour and Bug 15 minutes so she and I went shopping. JoAnn's has all their Halloween stuff out so Bug spent much of the time imitating Squirrel's spider scream and then giggling that spiders aren't scary.
We had our favorite for dinner (tater tot casserole) and then the meltdowns began again. My neighbors must all think I am a terrible parent leading my bawling toddler down the street after a mid walk fit. Well, she isn't really bawling, she just wants attention so we have to ignore it and the more we do the less we get. We flip back and forth between attention for good and then withdraw for the bad. It is like a test of wills between us and a toddler that will scream louder and louder as well as become physically more and more in your space. It is only her behaving as she knew, but we have such a small window to correct it. We do have Bug corrected so that generally she knows that good behavior gets the attention. Today she behaved so well that she got to stay up later and we looked at pictures together.
Only one more day of vacation to survive... wish me luck.
Also, if you are counting, the girls haven't seen their bioparents in 6 weeks.
Monday was a good day and Squirrel worked a half day so we could go visit a friend. It was fantastic. The girls got to ride on the pontoon, swim in shallow water, and then we went on jet skis! These two are fearless. We also watched snakes that were on the rocks at the edge of the water. Nice thing for us was that with 4 other adults around we were able to just sit back and watch. We are always so engaged with the girls that it is exhausting. More and more we work on getting them to play without the need for us to be always present, but it is short lived.
Tuesday through Thursday were a blur. A toddler filled blur. We tried to go to the Children's Museum, but it is closed for most of the month (they could have notified their members), and didn't have a good alternative so we did lunch (tacos) with one of my co-workers. Sissy was not on good behavior, not that she was completely awful, but it was not nearly as good as she usually is. We played outside, we played with playdough, we chased bugs, we took naps, I longed for day care.
We had a case worker visit this week. It was fine as usual. Mostly just a restart of visits (potentially) and a start of regular sibling visits. Apparently the biomom has emerged from her month of not returning calls and is ready to maybe start things back up. I'm not holding my breath. Sibling visits are now twice a month.
The next court date is set... Part of me wants there to be no progress to reunification so that termination can begin and the other part of me wants some progress to happen. It is a hard position as we love these two, but on a week as exhausting as this one, we want some of our freedom back.
We made a conscious effort to get some of our freedom back this weekend. I pulled out a 1000 piece puzzle and declared it mine. I feel like a kid licking a cupcake so a sibling won't eat it. For the most part the girls respected it. We did try to take a few toys upstairs to their room, but now we have castles in the hallway as they didn't behave in their room.
Today we had our first sibling visit with the 7 year old and her biodad's family. The other two siblings were to be there as well, however nobody informed their foster parents of the visit. The 7's family seems alright. We got more backstory, got to see more pictures. The aunt says that she has never seen our girls in anything but a diaper before. Such a sad existence these girls have had. We also found out that our girls most likely had their lice for over a year!
After our family visit we had some hotdogs and then went swimming! The girls did great. Bug didn't want to be in the water as much as be around it, but Sissy was in it and loved it. She didn't panic at all this time. Usually we have a few times which we have to put her out of the water because in a panic she injures one of us, but today she was great. After our swim it was nap time (reluctantly at first) of which Sissy slept for an hour and Bug 15 minutes so she and I went shopping. JoAnn's has all their Halloween stuff out so Bug spent much of the time imitating Squirrel's spider scream and then giggling that spiders aren't scary.
We had our favorite for dinner (tater tot casserole) and then the meltdowns began again. My neighbors must all think I am a terrible parent leading my bawling toddler down the street after a mid walk fit. Well, she isn't really bawling, she just wants attention so we have to ignore it and the more we do the less we get. We flip back and forth between attention for good and then withdraw for the bad. It is like a test of wills between us and a toddler that will scream louder and louder as well as become physically more and more in your space. It is only her behaving as she knew, but we have such a small window to correct it. We do have Bug corrected so that generally she knows that good behavior gets the attention. Today she behaved so well that she got to stay up later and we looked at pictures together.
Only one more day of vacation to survive... wish me luck.
Also, if you are counting, the girls haven't seen their bioparents in 6 weeks.
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
School Registration
There are free options for day care for the girls... namely Head Start. We don't really have a lot of experience with them, but based on some conversations I have had with others that have looked into them and then also because there are other requirements (more home visits) that happen when your child is in the program we opted to pick up part of the tab for our girls for other daycare/school options. It isn't that we don't like home visits, but we have enough already.
Today I had my first true experience with Head Start. Sissy is going to get into the early program for Pre-K and our daycare/school is a participant. Trick is, in order to qualify for "ours" one must first be waived out of the Head Start program. I didn't know this until I was wondering at school last week what the hold-up on acceptance was and they then informed me that the waiver was needed (I'm not proud of our school's administration either, but the teachers are awesome). They did however double check the system to make sure that Sissy's name wasn't in and needing approval. So I called Head Start today. While very nice, they were not aware that a three year old qualifies if the birthday is early enough in the fall and they apparently have not recently checked the system to see if they needed to accept anyone. *sigh*
Okay... so here is my thought on this. The income for this program is VERY low to be accepted. For a family of 4 the guaranteed acceptance is 24k or lower. Families in this bracket probably need a lot of help. These families are most likely not calling the school to check on their qualifications. Especially since the website you register on is not a Head Start website. For those of us first time round in the foster system this is also quite tricky. If there is a second go around with this I now know who to contact. While our "family" income puts us not in the bracket, the girls are not governed by our status.
I'm writing this right now while supervising "rest time" and the quote of the moment is "Bug, don't eat your bed." There is the distinct possibility by the end of this week that she will no longer have a bed frame as I will take it away if necessary.
I'm going to give the waiver 24 hours and then the girls and I will go to their school tomorrow to turn in paperwork and check on the status. We are still waiting on DHS to pick up half the cost (school is going to backdate their bill for us), but if we can get Sissy in the free program that would help immensely. This paying nearly a paycheck a month for daycare is a bit much, but then again, if we didn't go with them I probably would have lost my mind by now. I credit their school for potty training, colors, numbers, recognizing alphabets, decreasing separation anxiety, and really, giving us the ability to do this.
I also gave a call to Quicken this morning. They have been getting some great reviews and they just sent info with some reasonable rates for home refi and from a friend's experience they are super easy to work with. We are on track to refi for 15 years (I have 20 left on my current) and have lower payments. That would be super awesome and I would even be able to shave that 15 down more since I always overpay on my home loan. What is even more awesome is that they guarantee their own loans so that I won't have to work with the bank my mortgage is currently with and a customer service nightmare!
Well, the girls are both now asleep for their naps, so I can get up from this floor. My project list is long and it now includes more laundry as the very recently cleaned sheets are extremely dirty because how much ALL the animals love Sissy.
Today I had my first true experience with Head Start. Sissy is going to get into the early program for Pre-K and our daycare/school is a participant. Trick is, in order to qualify for "ours" one must first be waived out of the Head Start program. I didn't know this until I was wondering at school last week what the hold-up on acceptance was and they then informed me that the waiver was needed (I'm not proud of our school's administration either, but the teachers are awesome). They did however double check the system to make sure that Sissy's name wasn't in and needing approval. So I called Head Start today. While very nice, they were not aware that a three year old qualifies if the birthday is early enough in the fall and they apparently have not recently checked the system to see if they needed to accept anyone. *sigh*
Okay... so here is my thought on this. The income for this program is VERY low to be accepted. For a family of 4 the guaranteed acceptance is 24k or lower. Families in this bracket probably need a lot of help. These families are most likely not calling the school to check on their qualifications. Especially since the website you register on is not a Head Start website. For those of us first time round in the foster system this is also quite tricky. If there is a second go around with this I now know who to contact. While our "family" income puts us not in the bracket, the girls are not governed by our status.
I'm writing this right now while supervising "rest time" and the quote of the moment is "Bug, don't eat your bed." There is the distinct possibility by the end of this week that she will no longer have a bed frame as I will take it away if necessary.
I'm going to give the waiver 24 hours and then the girls and I will go to their school tomorrow to turn in paperwork and check on the status. We are still waiting on DHS to pick up half the cost (school is going to backdate their bill for us), but if we can get Sissy in the free program that would help immensely. This paying nearly a paycheck a month for daycare is a bit much, but then again, if we didn't go with them I probably would have lost my mind by now. I credit their school for potty training, colors, numbers, recognizing alphabets, decreasing separation anxiety, and really, giving us the ability to do this.
I also gave a call to Quicken this morning. They have been getting some great reviews and they just sent info with some reasonable rates for home refi and from a friend's experience they are super easy to work with. We are on track to refi for 15 years (I have 20 left on my current) and have lower payments. That would be super awesome and I would even be able to shave that 15 down more since I always overpay on my home loan. What is even more awesome is that they guarantee their own loans so that I won't have to work with the bank my mortgage is currently with and a customer service nightmare!
Well, the girls are both now asleep for their naps, so I can get up from this floor. My project list is long and it now includes more laundry as the very recently cleaned sheets are extremely dirty because how much ALL the animals love Sissy.
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